On Discipline

They say hind sight is 20/20. Given  the chance, who of us wouldn't go back and do a few things a little differently?! We all make the statement and say if I knew then what I know now, I would have done it this way.  We could have never known then what we know now. That's what makes us extraordinary. We only acquire this wisdom once we are over fifty. Unfortunately,we can never go back. By now we have reaped what we have sown.  A society of poorly disciplined people who will learn only as time passes by and maybe never learning at all.  Young parents as a whole seem to fall short in this area. Discipline  for the young is in poor supply and quality. This is a job that once the training is done, the job is over. Taking the priceless advice from the experienced (over 50)is never an  option. No one wants to be told how to discipline their children. Why?! I don't know. So we just keep our mouth shut and mind our own business. As we watch the next generation grow in disrespect, irresponsibility and laziness. There is too much permissiveness and there seems to be a role reversal in the home. Children are taking on the role of the parents in their actions. Parents are allowing this to happen. I overheard a conversation this week between a parent and a minor and I hope and pray that it was not a blast from the past of me and a minor in my charge. Children should not be talked to like the command their being given is optional or even negotiable. We love our children and always want them to be happy. We did or do what we think is/was best. Having their best interest at heart sometimes meant that we could not always be friends. It still means that, even as adults. Children need firm discipline or training and honesty. What we can't teach them, life will. Except it wont be kind,gentle or loving.  I heard it said once that: "A bad experience is better than good advice." There may be some truth in that statement. It may be the only chance left for those not properly trained to learn something beneficial.  The best thing about this for us is, that most of us over 50 now does not have to deal with this issue of discipline. Its behind us. But we can share with those who will allow us the things we know and perhaps save some from having regrets or making the same mistakes we did.

Resentment- To Have Or To Have Not ?

Welcome back to my Blog, my over 50's, Hope your day is going well! You know I was thinking the other day about this word.  Resentment. So I thought I'd do a blog on it.  At the moment I was feeling a little annoyed about general stuff.  The more I thought about it the worse I felt.  So I came to the conclusion that it is better to have not than to have. Resentment, that is.  It puts a hold on everything, nothing can move forward as long as resentment is a part of it. Relationships cant progress, it can actually cause a marriage to fail. Its like a ball and a chain, no matter how you would like to move ahead its a constant restraint (IF you don't let it go). It keeps you back. Its an awful feeling because you replay over and over in your subconscious the injury or  insult and those same feelings pop up every time. And you feel the exact pain every time it comes across your mind.  That's mental abuse. Its an assault against your own body. I thought to myself, what's the difference between someone assaulting me or me assaulting myself?  An assault is an assault no matter how you look at it.  BUT actually me assaulting myself is far worse.  I am learning that when we hold on to resentment we are hurting our self more than anyone else. LET IT GO! IT IS TRULY BETTER TO HAVE NOT! Being Over 50 and extraordinary has taught us these kind of lessons in life. So lets learn to benefit from the things we have been taught.We can only flourish in the absence of it. We need to forget and move forward. Resentment is a thought process, we need to change our thinking. That calls for humility and making adjustments on our part. We need to laugh sometimes in the face of adversity. That will help us to get through it. By now we should have learned that it is not worth it. So free yourselves and continue living the extraordinary life you've earned!! Agree or disagree? let me know, follow me on facebook at: #jogates.

On Laughing !! LOL

Make the sounds and movements of the face and body that show amusement! Suggest the feeling of joy!!! That's how the dictionary defines laugh .  Hello  my over 50's and extraordinary, I hope you're laughing or at least laugh often. Its such a feel good thing! Did you know that when you laugh, it massages your insides?!? And a massage is oh so so wonderful !  There is so many things in life that will make us do just the opposite. But we have to search out the amusement and joy, really seek it. If we don't we will lose our laughter. That would be tantamount to losing the sun of our body. Its our light and needs to be shared. Being joyful keeps us healthy and youthful. We will attract happy people, yes its contagious, it spreads. I remember once when I was younger, I acquired a really good friend through laughing. That was all it took. She always told me, "I loved your laughter". Nothing feels better than being in the company of  joyful happy people.  Its the group people are looking to join. So when we really seek something , we go after it.  So whatever it is that you find funny, make time for it. Do you remember the little section in readers digest book called 'laughter is the best medicine".  I found that section to be so amusing and I loved reading the short stories so full of humor. Some of which I will never forget. You can hardly find that little paperback book in that form today. Yes laughing is good for our soul.  We need to always see the funny side of the street. It doesn't have to be sunny. Consider the lighter side of things, if we do we will feel so much better.  So try these tips: "How to laugh more" 1. If a person makes you laugh, call them more often. 2. Read a funny story, watch a funny movie 3. Watch a funny video (youtube is full of them) 4. Ponder the funny things that have happened in your life and laugh again. 5. Read a spoof on your adversity,such as " The joy of being broke" by Ben Goode  6. Laugh together with your mate  more often. 7. Buy tickets to see your favorite comedian. 8. Play a sweet joke on a loved one. 9. Go to an amusement park. 10. Try an activity that always give you a thrill, like tobogganing or a roller coaster. Try these and tell me what you think!!!! I hope you laugh!!!

EBOLA- As I see It !!

Ebola, the most understated  epidemic of the 21st century!!  This is not a normal blog for my over 50's. But today I wanted to share with them  something that's on the minds of many.  That's putting into perspective the Ebola Virus epidemic from my own personal viewpoint.  In spite of the devastating footage the media has displayed, the horrific stories of individuals and families whose lives have been touched by it, here and abroad  and even more extreme the victims  whose lives that was abruptly snuffed out by this deadly disease. Not to mention the stories in the media to control its spread, whats being done to prevent an outbreak in this country, protocol to follow, research for vaccines etc. etc.,  it still  remains one of the most understated epidemics of our time. There remains many unanswered questions such as how it is spread in the natural environment?  Disaster's, whether human or natural up to the present times has been measured in terms of the lives it claims.  Such as the Spanish Flu or the Flu of the 20th century. It wiped out nearly 5% of the worlds population. It was deemed the greatest medical holocaust ever. Does the Ebola carry that same quality potential? The Ebola Virus is an extremely highly transferable flu.  It has very similar symptoms and many of the same as did the flu of 1918, including the time or season of the outbreak. Many similarities  exist between the two, frightfully so !! The real truth about the Ebola has not been fully exposed to an already fearful public.  But knowing the truth could cause a new kind of panic of epic proportions. Something like what would be considered a perfect panic and could change the life the way we know it today.  Putting the Ebola Virus into perspective. The Ebola Virus is the Spanish Influenza of the 21st  century. The Ebola is not a new virus but has been on the scene for nearly 40 years.  The world is now experiencing an outbreak that has claimed the lives of two and a half times of people in the last twelve months than it has claimed in the last nearly 40 years since it's discovery in 1976. Its much smaller on the worlds territorial scale, but just as deadly with the fatality rates up to 83% and climbing of those who contacted it. Whereas the fatality rate of the Flu epidemic was 20% of those who contacted it. These statistics makes the Ebola itself even more deadly.  The government has decided to quarantine individuals who have had  some kind of contact with an infected person so as to keep the cost down in treatment of those with the potential threat of contacting the disease as well as to  decrease the spread.  Thus making Ebola inherently a matter of money or cost.  In recent news a health worker was put into quarantine as a result of close contact although showing no symptoms  threatened to sue due to the conditions of the confinement and was released as a result.  This release was in spite of the fact the required amount of time for isolation had not been met. What kind of message does this send to the public? It tells me that in this situation, irregardless of the threat possibly present, that the threat of being sued takes first place. The ugly truth is Ebola is a natural war on health. More threatening even than most know it to be. The cost and casualties unknown. Without containing this deadly disease, it has the potential to become in statistics the same as the Spanish Flu (Flu) nearly one hundred years ago.  Could the world ever recover? The slightest ray of hope that remains is that pathogenic  viruses become less lethal with time. We can only hope and pray that this will be the case with the Ebola.  So even tho the Spanish Flu is gone but certainly not forgotten and just maybe rearing its ugly head in this latest epidemic with a new name "The Ebola Virus."

On Happiness !!

Isn't it funny that before we were over fifty and extraordinary our view of happiness was what we now consider a silly fantasy?? Maybe so, but I loved what I dreamed what happiness would be for me. Happiness for most was always some future reality. I often  remember hearing so often the statement "I'll be when.... Whether it was for a new job, weight loss, vacation etc. etc. etc.  Well one thing we have learned for sure that happiness is quite clever. It eludes most everyone.  Or does it really? Were we happy and didn't realize it? Or was it just our perspective of what happiness is  all wrong? One good thing about growing older , like fine  wine,we  get better and better.  They say hindsight is 20/20. Because we see things truly from different perspective.  We accept the reality of things and we kinda lose the dream.  Or at least we put it in a different perspective. At our age we kinda reconsider what happiness is. Happiness and its meaning has changed greatly since I was a younger woman. Its now good health, safety and well being of our loved ones and things like these. Its not what we would have called happiness then but it certainly is now.  So my friends strive to be happy, if we could just have whats its turned out to be, happiness can no longer elude us.  So if you know what happiness in to you, clap your hands!

Technology

Technology, a wonderful thing. Its why we are where we are today!!! Without it life would be very complicated. For we would still be riding a  horse and buggy. Using candles for light, and getting up to turn the channel on the TV.  God forbid, what would would happen then!? The most widely accepted form of change in technology with no talked about negative side effects.  Modern conveniences, yes that's right, they make our life so easy so quickly. We get so dependent on them its scary.  Our smart phones, computers, laptops, seat belts . How did folks of the past generations get along without them?!?! But at the same time technology can be so intimidating.  Now the term  latest technology to many of us over fifty it is just plain frightening. We find it intimidating just to operate a VCR, well now that's  become obsolete, its the DVD player. Technology changes so quickly we cant keep up with it.  Forget about the smart phone, the tablet! We act as though we may be bitten. Well I know for sure the smart phone or the tablet don't  bite.  And the smart phone is not so smart, if it rings, it doesn't know how to answer itself either.Then we have this morbid fear of change and worry  the towers  will stop picking up signals,( I swear some of that's happening right now). Or the computer might crash and everything we have will be frozen.  We have to view latest technology as a sign  of the changing times.  And we must change with the times. Technology has always been the same, it has always bought something new and improved. Have to admit that some of the side effects can be scary.  Even to our parents, the latest technology represented a threat to their comfort or to what they were use to. Truth is Technology is a very good thing. Its our friend. Think of the pluses , we live longer as a result of latest medical technology,  our homes are more convenient and comfortable  as a result of modern technology,(oh those big screen TV's and theater seats !), we get information a lot quicker and we can travel faster. We even live more secure.  All due to the latest in technology  in different areas.  So let us embrace the ever changes technology will continue to bring to our lives.  Not fearing it but rather moving, growing and sharing as much as we can as a result of it. Technology is our friend, none of its too difficult to grasp.  Through the use of it, some of us maybe  even able to fulfill something on our bucket list. Now that's a good thing!!

The Bucket List

Ahhh, the bucket list ! The infamous bucket list. Do you really need  a bucket list?  I never thought I did but I am putting one together now.  What is a bucket list? Why is it important that we have one? Well they say you only live once. Life is so full of things to do and most never even scratch the surface. Why is that?  Just like everything else along the way, we put off to a more convenient time  or are we just procrastinators by nature? Sometimes the fear of doing something will  hinder the things we'd  like to accomplish. Even our life circumstances. I know when our families are young, we are afraid to take unnecessary risk out of fear of something happening  to us and then who would care for our young ?  But now at this stage in life we understand how fear has exercised  a restraint over us. There is nothing to fear but fear itself!!!  Sometimes tho fear has nothing to do with it, but we are more concerned about what others may think. So we allow ourselves to remain in their comfort zone. How unfair to us!  Even though we are of an extraordinary group, there are certain challenges we now need to face. We need to learn to live life with as few regrets as possible. Seize the moment ! Time is precious, should a door or window open take the opportunity to explore the possibilities now that you have the chance.  For you may not be presented with such an opportunity again. Yes, the bucket list is necessary!! Lets get it out, let it be filled till it overflows. Always remembering that fear is only False Evidence Appearing Real!!! Whats gonna be on your bucket list?!?!?  Are you gonna jump out of a plane? Write a novel? Extreme or not, its on your list. I'd love to hear. Please share!!! Follow me on twitter at jogates15 and niftyafterfifty.blogspot.com.

Think Fit !!!

While being extraordinary is great, but that doesn't make us fit.  Fitness is one of our greatest challenges. A challenge we all must conquer.  It is also one of our best allies. Because its our helper or supporter for good health, which promotes longevity.  Recent studies show women to be the most health conscience in their fifties.   We get regular screenings and taking part in activities regularly such as walking,spinning, swimming, changing eating habits, lifestyles and more. Studies have shown and proven  the greater risk in unwanted Illness's  are through inactivity and weight gain.  This is the age where the metabolism slows down and the pounds are much easier to pack on and making it  much more difficult to lose weight.  We know movement is life, no matter what the diagnosis is, we can educate our self  and find an exercise program that's suitable for our condition.  Remember, we are on a mission and  ain' t no stopping us now, we are on the move.  The single most thing we can do to lose weight and keep it off  is to exercise.  So lets buddy up, get on the road to fitness, develop healthy eating habits, remember change starts in the mind. Take time out to relieve stress and really learn how to nurture our well being.  Because we can!!!  Id love to here about your new fitness goals, please share!!

Extraordinary in Wisdom !!!

Ahhhh, wisdom, what a wonderful word!! By the time we are over 50 and extraordinary we have acquired so much wisdom. This wisdom keeps us mentally and emotionally stronger. The ability to use the knowledge we have learned in life is now a real asset. Others notice it too. Don't you know what you like with out having to think twice about it?!? They've come to know we don't care what they think.  Many find our stance intimidating. With the the knowledge we now possess, we know the sky's the limit. When I was younger , I use to think women over fifty were old. I never knew they had so much to offer. I now realize how young I really am. I'm just getting started.  There is so much more to life for us. We finally learn to let go resentments, and know  there is wisdom in that. Something we couldn't understand long ago. We have a lot of wisdom to share, we make the best mentors. For the younger women, we are super role models with five decades of life experience behind us. How many others can say that?  Women over 50 have no shame, we see the  humor in our own imperfections. What a feeling!!  As the saying goes: " dance like nobody's  watching and sing like nobody is listening! " Now for once in our life , we have the world eating out of our hand.  And it feels grand !!  So if you haven't done away with the traits of the ordinary, fuel those powers from within and become one of who you are "the extraordinary" and live life well. Ladies, don't deprive yourself, you've earned it!!

Being Beautiful

I've finally learned and truly believe that being beautiful is a state of mind and condition of the heart. It has nothing to do with our outer appearance.  Although we can look beautiful too, it comes from within. We come to learn after all these decades that beauty comes from the inside. Once we achieve that belief  and feeling the outside works naturally in harmony with what we feel.   So yes girls,  we all are as beautiful as we want to be, its always been within our power to be!!  All those years spent on trying to feel beautiful by adding more and applying more and never quite feeling  the way we expected, what a waste of time little did we know. Always feeling something was  lacking when  the power to be beautiful was ever present. Being over 50 and extraordinary  I've  learned we control our own beauty.  We have learned so much at this stage that we can have a supreme happiness that sets us free from all those little things that never made a difference anyway. We need to ponder these things. So be beautiful today, and share your exuberance with the world! Over 50 and finally extraordinary!! You truly are!!!

Romance after 50

Romance, books, movies but most importantly life! Girls have you noticed that you still feel the same now about romance as you did when you were sixteen? our dreams of being romanced have not lessened. Isnt it funny it took us all these years to learn that upon arriving here we would still feel the same!? The feeling you get from a rose , a walk or candle lit dinner has not been changed by the passage of time ! Tell me after all these years the one thing you love that has not changed!!! I'd love to hear form you, so please share!! follow my blog at: justniftyafterfifty.blog.com